Starting your own business is not an easy endeavor and takes a lot of work. Now add having a full-time demanding job plus husband and kids! You are probably wondering how I can do it all…huh?
Well, I have secret to share that really helps…my husband is a stay-at-home father! He has been since my youngest son has born. Given this nice advantage doesn’t mean that everything comes easy though. I am constantly making tons of sacrifices and doing a lot of juggling of all my priorities. It makes me feel exhausted to think about it so I try not to think about it too much and just do prioritize as much as possible!
I continue to make this a priority but my kids are growing so fast that I am scared that I am going to wake up one day and they have already graduated college and I missed everything. But then I tell myself to shut-up and get real!!! My kids need space now too (they are 12 & 15) and if I tried to spend every free moment with them they would truly want to kill me…alright not kill me but you get my drift. Therefore, I have to continue to remember to make it quality over quantity. I make sure to go to all (ok…almost all) their special events. No matter how tempting it is for me to pick up my phone during an event I refrain from it. It is all easier said than done. There are so many times that my kids have been talking to me and they catch me totally spaced out…I hate when that happens. The important thing is to try not to beat yourself up too badly and just learn from it.
I have to admit, when it comes to my husband, there are many times that I don’t make him as much as a priority as I should. It is just can get so hard after working all day and then coming home to make sure that I spend time with the kids (which most of those times he is included too). There are a lot of evenings that I need to work still after the kids go to bed so there goes our one-on-one time together.
He has been very patient, but in all honesty, I know that is not going to last forever. Of course, the guilt starts to churn more at this point. I feel like such a bad wife when I chose to work instead of spend time with him. As I am in the middle of writing this, I know I need to change this and start carving out time for us to have date night at least once a week. I will let you know how that goes!
Staying focused is tough at times but I just keep telling myself that it pays the bills so I can’t f*%k it up. That seems to keep my in shape. I just have to remember if I need to take care of my business then I need to do it on my breaks. What is really interesting is that I just recently got promoted but feel guilty because I feel like I am trying to have my cake and eat it too. Weird…huh? I am not sure where this is coming from but it drives me a little crazy because I wonder if I were a man if I would have that same feeling of guilt…probably not. I keep getting told that it was “well deserved” so I am trying to accept it and own it!
As you can see there is so much that goes into this fashion business and leaves me with hardly any time for myself. I know that many of you are probably thinking “why do it then?” I just have this burning desire inside myself to make it work. It keeps me going everyday. I do have many days of doubt though, but when I do have those days, I just remember why I decided to start!
After I get through all my priorities each day I am only left with time for sleep. Sleep is something I can’t go without and need at least seven hours a night. There goes watching any T.V. or reading a book for enjoyment.
Although, I am feeling spread thin in multiple directions and feeling guilty is something I deal everyday, I am not going to quit. For me, the biggest regret would be quitting and not keep going. I have come this far and I will persevere!